Random joke thread

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Darth Rover
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Darth Rover » Thu Feb 21, 2013 8:20 pm

A kid was talking to his dad the other day and he said 'dad i want to be an astronaut when i grow up'. 'Well son' he replied 'You'd have been shot into space already if i'd not been pissed'.

Savory
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Savory » Thu Feb 21, 2013 9:17 pm

Rover the Top wrote:Apparently Oscar Pistorius wanted a new bathroom door - his missus was dead against it...
:lol:

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Re: Random joke thread

Post by mcteeth » Thu Mar 07, 2013 1:28 pm


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Rover the Top
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Rover the Top » Thu Mar 07, 2013 1:54 pm

Isn't that 3 years too late? Labour actually did introduce ID cards for "Northerners" (specifically those in Manchester) in late 2009... :yeahright:

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Rover Ryan
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Rover Ryan » Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:25 pm

Congratulation to Cardiff's promotion, becoming the third Welsh Premier League team besides Swansea and Spurs!! :D

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Rover Ryan
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Rover Ryan » Sat Apr 20, 2013 1:54 am

I wonder if Dzhokhar Tsarnaev was trying to paddle his way out of that back yard!? :yeahright:

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Gibbon
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Gibbon » Sat Apr 20, 2013 9:14 am

Maybe he realised he was up shit creek.

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Rover the Top
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Rover the Top » Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:01 am

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iamarover
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by iamarover » Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:29 am

:lol:

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Rover the Top
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Rover the Top » Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:13 am

Saw this on a t-shirt t'other day:

There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't.

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Dan
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Dan » Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:45 am

Seen that a few times, and had to explain it to a few people too.

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Hudson
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Hudson » Thu Aug 29, 2013 9:14 am

Saw this in the comment section on the LET regarding the Marshall Transfer:
I note that Fairy Liquid's latest advert is set in a Burnley Council Estate .

"Mummy , why are your hands so soft ?"

"Because I'm only fourteen , now shut up and eat your Pot Noodle "

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Rover Ryan
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Rover Ryan » Fri Aug 30, 2013 3:45 pm

:lol:

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Rover the Top
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Rover the Top » Thu Dec 05, 2013 3:19 pm

I hate Christmas! I spend all year working my arse off just so I can afford to buy presents for the kids, yet come Christmas morning it's that fat fucker with the beard who gets all the credit...

...still, I suppose it serves me right for marrying her...

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Rover the Top
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Re: Random joke thread

Post by Rover the Top » Tue Aug 19, 2014 3:00 pm

Allegedly, the 'funniest' jokes from this year's Edinburgh Fringe.

I can only assume quality was in short supply this time.

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