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Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 8:20 pm
by Darth Rover
A kid was talking to his dad the other day and he said 'dad i want to be an astronaut when i grow up'. 'Well son' he replied 'You'd have been shot into space already if i'd not been pissed'.

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 9:17 pm
by Savory
Rover the Top wrote:Apparently Oscar Pistorius wanted a new bathroom door - his missus was dead against it...
:lol:

Image

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Thu Mar 07, 2013 1:28 pm
by mcteeth

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Thu Mar 07, 2013 1:54 pm
by Rover the Top
Isn't that 3 years too late? Labour actually did introduce ID cards for "Northerners" (specifically those in Manchester) in late 2009... :yeahright:

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Wed Apr 17, 2013 12:25 pm
by Rover Ryan
Congratulation to Cardiff's promotion, becoming the third Welsh Premier League team besides Swansea and Spurs!! :D

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Sat Apr 20, 2013 1:54 am
by Rover Ryan
I wonder if Dzhokhar Tsarnaev was trying to paddle his way out of that back yard!? :yeahright:

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Sat Apr 20, 2013 9:14 am
by Gibbon
Maybe he realised he was up shit creek.

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:01 am
by Rover the Top
Image

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:29 am
by iamarover
:lol:

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:13 am
by Rover the Top
Saw this on a t-shirt t'other day:

There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't.

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:45 am
by Dan
Seen that a few times, and had to explain it to a few people too.

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Thu Aug 29, 2013 9:14 am
by Hudson
Saw this in the comment section on the LET regarding the Marshall Transfer:
I note that Fairy Liquid's latest advert is set in a Burnley Council Estate .

"Mummy , why are your hands so soft ?"

"Because I'm only fourteen , now shut up and eat your Pot Noodle "

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Fri Aug 30, 2013 3:45 pm
by Rover Ryan
:lol:

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Thu Dec 05, 2013 3:19 pm
by Rover the Top
I hate Christmas! I spend all year working my arse off just so I can afford to buy presents for the kids, yet come Christmas morning it's that fat fucker with the beard who gets all the credit...

...still, I suppose it serves me right for marrying her...

Re: Random joke thread

Posted: Tue Aug 19, 2014 3:00 pm
by Rover the Top
Allegedly, the 'funniest' jokes from this year's Edinburgh Fringe.

I can only assume quality was in short supply this time.