Thegreatglobalwarmingswindle

There must be more to life than football?
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Gibbon
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Post by Gibbon » Wed Jul 18, 2007 9:49 am

Enough of that stuff....what about this Dihydogen Monoxidestuff.

:whistle: ;)

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Gibbon
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Post by Gibbon » Thu Jul 19, 2007 1:57 pm

And here you go...blackle.

This'll save the planet for sure. :scratch: :whistle:

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Rover the Top
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Post by Rover the Top » Thu Jul 19, 2007 2:00 pm


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mrblackbat
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Post by mrblackbat » Thu Jul 19, 2007 2:13 pm


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Post by Rover the Top » Thu Jul 19, 2007 4:28 pm

Aha! So there is no global warming after all...
This time last year Briton was experiencing a very different kind of extreme weather. A year ago today, the highest UK temperature for July of 36.3C (97.3F) was recorded in Charlwood, Surrey.
So, it must be cooler this year. I rest my case. ;)

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Post by doz_magic_man » Thu Jul 19, 2007 5:44 pm

Apparently this summer's dose of shit weather is due to the weather system \"La Nina\", the sister of El Nino. Northern prevailing winds have been shifted unusually south bringing us cooler, wet weather. If history is anything to go by, when this has happened before the disruptive weather stayed all summer. Greeeeeat.

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Post by Rover the Moon » Thu Jul 19, 2007 6:31 pm

I thought it was because the atlantic jet stream was further south than normal pushing the air that normally goes to iceland over us?

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Post by doz_magic_man » Thu Jul 19, 2007 10:23 pm

Yeah it could be the jet stream instead of the prevailing winds I can't remember, but la nina is causing it to go further south, according to The Times.

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Post by Rover the Moon » Thu Jul 19, 2007 10:44 pm

I hope it la fucks off

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Post by Rover the Top » Thu Jul 26, 2007 3:23 pm

Football is destroying the planet...

And the morning news on the BBC said that the alcohol content of wine had increased because of climate change...

... but strangely, wet weather isn't! :shock:

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Post by iamarover » Wed Aug 08, 2007 10:17 am

From John Nicholson's column on football365:
Just exactly how will global warming affect season 2007/08? My consciousness has been raised by those fantastic concerts because until I'm told by pop stars what to think about, I am a gormless void. Apparantly, according to environmentalists and that bald lad in Travis, the end of the world is nigh and not even Sky Sports can stop it. Blimey.

August: After a summer of rain - which is definitely due to global warming - the season kicks off and Friends of the Earth warn that Jamie Redknapp is personally hastening global warming by emitting so much hot air. The greenest footballer of them all, David James, starts to store all the CO2 he gives off in crisp bags in his attic.

September: After a month of dry hot weather - which is also definitely due to global warming - climatologists say they are certain that unless players stop travelling to games in gas guzzling buses the earth will die before the 4th round of the FA Cup. David James converts the Portsmouth coach to run on his hair clippings, rabbit droppings and mashed up Armani underpants.

October: After a month of windy weather - caused without doubt by global warming - environmentalists say that a hole in the ozone has been detected above every football ground caused by fans singing so much and that everyone should stay silent in future or stand accused of killing the earth.

November: After the warmest month with a V in it this year, tree-huggers storm the FA and demand that big fat Brian Barwick be ritually slaughtered as a sacrifice to appease The Green Man and also to stop him farting out enough methane to heat a whole galaxy of planets. Barwick hides behind Steve McClaren who cries a lot and says he's always bought Ecover washing up liquid so it can't be his fault.

December: After the coldest month for 50 years, daft greenies say that a cold winter is proof that the ice caps are melting and that it's all the fault of the baby Bentley culture. Arsenal fans claim their ability to stay silent for 90 minutes during each home game has actually always been a green measure to prevent heating of the ozone, yah? David James converts Harry Redknapp to run on bio fuels.

January: A damp Tuesday is said to officially be the dampest Tuesday in January since records began and final proof that getting on a plane is an act of pure evil that makes whole colonies of Puffins cry. Under pressure from wacko ecos UEFA insists all players travel to international games on donkeys and hold their breath for the whole journey so as not to give off any green house gasses. David James builds a solar powered donkey and has a windmill fitted to his bum.

February: Sunshine and showers throughout the month is said to be a sure sign of global warming and the imminent death of mankind. In a panic measure Five Live sacks Alan Green claiming he is a global warming denier after he moans about being a bit chilly while commentating on a 0-0 draw at Sunderland.

David James sets up a green airline for footballers. Players are carried in free-range, organically grown grass baskets by teams of specially trained herons. Greenpeace claim that a thunderstorm during Chelsea's 3-0 F.A cup defeat by Hartlepool is a sign that Gaia is reclaiming the planet for Mother Nature and that thunder and lightening is the earth showing its disapproval of Chelsea's transfer policy. The warm weather encourages John Motson to do commentaries in a sheepskin Speedo, much to Lawro's approval.

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Post by iamarover » Wed Aug 08, 2007 10:18 am

March: After a month of fog, which is, all the scientists agree, definitely caused by global warming, hysterical environmentalists say football strips should be made out of compostable carrier bags or knitted from string in order to Save The Planet. David James turns out dressed in a body stocking knitted out of jute grown in his bath. Another concert is organised to raise awareness of global warming but after poor ticket sales it's cancelled and the 12 hours of fund raising prime time TV booked to make everyone feel bad about themselves is filled instead with a film of Madonna chewing a wasp, with a comic voiceover by Ricky Gervais.

April: After a breezy month of really big clouds moving quickly across the sky, enviro-knobs declare that a new climatological phenomenon of 'very rapid air movement' is proof of imminent global devastation. The self indulgent sandal wearing eco-loons declare it's a sign that the earth is really dying and we must all start living inside hollowed out turnips and start eating stones.

After an especially warm 23rd of April, the warmest 23rd of April EVER! green terrorists threaten to bomb football clubs who don't convert all club vehicles to hybrid cars. When someone points out that when you plug in a car to the mains it's actually using up electricity from a power station which is probably even more polluting than nice modern petrol and that growing bio fuels will inevitably reduce the earths' biodiversity and hasten the destruction of the rain forests......they are beaten up with wholemeal bread sticks.

May: A couple of weeks of heavy rain mean Norwich is now under water and has to be moved to the Peak district. The Wash is abandoned after a gang of vicious otters wage war on the locals.

Manchester United win another league title and Alex Ferguson finally retires to grow grapes in the Cote de Wilmslow, which, after a hot spell, is now a forest of vines and lemon trees which is obviously a really terrible thing and not just something which we can adapt to and enjoy. Melanoma's become more fashionable than tattoos. David James encourages players to kill themselves in order to stop destroying Mother Earth.

Don't say you haven't been warned!

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Post by theadore » Mon Oct 22, 2007 2:14 pm

Image

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Post by winston_the_cat » Wed Nov 14, 2007 7:45 am

MMGW is not a theory but rather a hypothesis. As such, it was advanced to explain a period of rapid warming of the climate over at least the last 150 years. No one disputes the 150 year temperature trend. It remains the only hypothesis that can be sustained to explain this warming trend. Alternatives, like solar activity/cosmic nucleides, or internal oscillations of the climate system have all been falsified. What is more controversial are the prognoses, which are based on an emerging theory from the MMGW hypothesis and are subject to increasing uncertainty the further into the future you peek. But nevertheless, we are seeing faster growth of CO2 levels in the atmosphere than predicted now, probably because CO2 sinks in the oceans are already being overwhelmed, and from the geologic record, we know that high CO2 levels correlate with vastly warmer temperatures, even if many other factors could play a role in determining climate.

Incidentally, I heard a talk claiming Neo-Proterozoic (>500 Ma) age CO2 levels were 90-120,000 ppm (today we are talking about 280-350 ppm so a factor of 500-1000 less). However, solar intensity was 7% of today ue in part to the nature of the atmosphere and in part to the state of the sun, whilst surface temperatures were bubbling at an average around 50C (it was claimed). CO2 will force climate.

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