Calling all parents

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mrblackbat
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Re: Calling all parents

Post by mrblackbat » Wed Nov 21, 2018 6:16 am

Rover the Top wrote:
Tue Nov 20, 2018 4:08 pm
Now you seem to be doing a hatty and ignoring what's said to you, so good day to you.
Pot... Kettle.... Black?

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mrblackbat
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Re: Calling all parents

Post by mrblackbat » Wed Nov 21, 2018 8:56 am

Oh and lets not forget that to go in "search of food and drink" is down two flights of stairs to the cafe or vending machine should the former be closed.....

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Re: Calling all parents

Post by Rover the Top » Wed Nov 21, 2018 10:09 am

mrblackbat wrote:
Wed Nov 21, 2018 8:56 am
Oh and lets not forget that to go in "search of food and drink" is down two flights of stairs to the cafe or vending machine should the former be closed.....
The cafe is only open 9am until 4pm, the vending machine provides water and soft drinks only. Oddly enough, it didn't cross my mind that I needed to abandon my wife in labour for half an hour to get down to the cafe before it closed... ;) Mrs RTT can't understand your objection to suggesting things should be better either - there's no logic in saying providing a recliner instead of an armchair and allowing partners some food would be detrimental to her care, she felt it was to her benefit to have me there. The only justification is penny-pinching to make up for mismanagement and inefficiencies elsewhere in the NHS, and that's really not good enough in this day and age.

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Re: Calling all parents

Post by mrblackbat » Wed Nov 21, 2018 11:21 am

You're totally missing the point here and focussed only on your experience. You were in for a day. My other half was in for four days, Dan and his partner were in for 9 days. Should they be providing my meals for the duration? Which meals? For the whole ward? For each maternity unit in the country? Suddenly the small cost of buying you a sandwich has turned into a much larger cost.

Given that maternity wards across Greater Manchester are having to redirect people due to being full or short on staff, I'd rather they spent the money and used the space to have more beds and equipment for mothers and more midwives available than buying you a sandwich cause your forgot to pack them in your bag.

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Re: Calling all parents

Post by Rover the Top » Wed Nov 21, 2018 1:18 pm

mrblackbat wrote:
Wed Nov 21, 2018 11:21 am
You're totally missing the point here and focussed only on your experience. You were in for a day. My other half was in for four days, Dan and his partner were in for 9 days. Should they be providing my meals for the duration? Which meals? For the whole ward? For each maternity unit in the country? Suddenly the small cost of buying you a sandwich has turned into a much larger cost.

Given that maternity wards across Greater Manchester are having to redirect people due to being full or short on staff, I'd rather they spent the money and used the space to have more beds and equipment for mothers and more midwives available than buying you a sandwich cause your forgot to pack them in your bag.
Yes, I am saying if you have to be in for longer, the greater the need for facilities to be provided to accommodate the partner. The fact you think I'm focussed on my experience shows how short sighted you're being and missing the point. Having someone else there to support the mother alleviates pressure on a short staffed ward - surely you accept having midwives fetch drinks and watch baby whilst mum goes to the loo is poor use of their time? And sure, there's a need to train more midwives and possibly a need to increase capacity and extend maternity wards. But trying to cram more beds into the existing finite space would not improve quality of care. And it's not even the issue - you seem to be hung up on the false notion that there has to be some trade off, which is untrue. Following your logic, you must object to chairs being provided for visitors, visitors' toilets and the fact that cafe takes up precious room that could be filled with more beds?

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Re: Calling all parents

Post by mrblackbat » Wed Nov 21, 2018 1:38 pm

You're totally focussed only on your experience. For my experience: I personally did not stay on the maternity ward the whole time for four days: I didn't need to. Going downstairs to get coffee wasn't a problem and I was actively encouraged to do so by the midwives in order to take a break. Going across the road to Sainsbury's to buy nappies and other items wasn't a problem.

Waiting on a breast pump was an issue. Waiting for an available birthing pool was an issue. Being delayed on starting the induction was an issue (as it was for you too). Closing a maternity ward is obviously a huge issue.

Having midwives check how a mum is doing isn't a poor use of their time: it's their job. And a newborn baby can quite happily be left in a cot for a few minutes whilst it's mother uses the toilet/makes a cup of tea or whatever.

There absolutely has to be prioritisations (i.e. trade offs, as you like to call it). There isn't infinite resource available to the NHS and so resources need to be prioritised. Comfy chairs and free coffee and sandwiches for a partner rightly don't come high on that list; perhaps when all the other problems are sorted out, it's something that might be worth considering, but in the meantime more equipment, more qualified staff, and more places for mothers are where the prioritisation obviously needs to be.

By the sounds of things, you guys had a relatively easy and smooth ride, which is great; but perhaps that's why you're having complaints about things that I don't really see as that important.

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Re: Calling all parents

Post by Rover the Top » Wed Nov 21, 2018 4:09 pm

mrblackbat wrote:
Wed Nov 21, 2018 1:38 pm
You're totally focussed only on your experience. For my experience: I personally did not stay on the maternity ward the whole time for four days: I didn't need to.
Ah. You mean you're focussed on your experience. Great, you didn't need to stay the whole time - go you! As with many things, you don't seem able to see any other way of doing things other than what suited you. Dan had a much longer stay and was the one who brought up the sleeping in a chair, lack of drinks, etc. Buying some more suitable furniture next time they're refurbishing and giving out extra coffees ain't going to impact on the number of midwives qualifying or how many beds they can fit on a ward. And there are benefits for the care of the mother in letting the partner stay, even if they didn't apply in your situation.

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Re: Calling all parents

Post by mrblackbat » Wed Nov 21, 2018 8:07 pm

Rover the Top wrote:
Wed Nov 21, 2018 4:09 pm
mrblackbat wrote:
Wed Nov 21, 2018 1:38 pm
You're totally focussed only on your experience. For my experience: I personally did not stay on the maternity ward the whole time for four days: I didn't need to.
Ah. You mean you're focussed on your experience.


No, I mean you are only focussed on your experience.
Rover the Top wrote:
Wed Nov 21, 2018 4:09 pm
As with many things, you don't seem able to see any other way of doing things other than what suited you.
Image

As for not needing to stay the entire time, I think it applies to almost all partners, in most cases. I don't know whether you attended NCT sessions, but they actually advise doing this. They also advise that the times they give for inducements are guides and are often delayed by other mums going into labour, that there's little point the partner being there at the start of an inducement cause very little tends to happen, and that making sure you're rested by going home means you're fresh to look after your partner when they come home with the newborn. :shrug:

On top of that they (and again during the tour of the maternity unit) mentioned that refreshments are only available for mums and baby, and recommended packing sandwiches and snacks and a blanket in a bag. :shrug:

Anyway, like I said, sounds like overall you had a pretty smooth experience, being able to get out the hospital quickly with a nice healthy daughter and well Mrs RTT; so all's well that ends well.

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